Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Day 2

I'm on day 2 of feeling more depressed than normal. I understand that even with medication, these times come along anyway, just to be pains in my ass. But its interfering with my ability to apply for jobs, as I keep getting rejection emails (which frankly, I'm sick of), and of completing my homework, which I'm falling behind on this week. I have been spending too much time staring off into space not being able to see any possible future. My thoughts are plagued with darkness, that only help with making me feel worse about myself. I'm also feeling lonely, even though my brother is home all day and my parents came home last night. Didn't see Mike yesterday, but I'll see him today. But will it lift the loneliness? Who knows.

I also still don't know if I should go to Kohl's and ask for my job back. I probably should, since I have no other prospects. But I'm afraid of making decisions because so many of my big decisions have ended up being terrible decisions, most of which I'm still trying to deal with, such as going to school for something enjoyable instead of something useful. And even going to Western in the first place. So many things just adding up to where I am now, which is nowhere. I don't even know if I should be back in school or not. Will it even help me?

Little bro brought home pizza. Going to indulge. With coffee.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Flower Hat and Scarf

I feel entitled to complain a bit here, so I'm going to.

Been having one of those blah days. No motivation to do anything, and I could pretty much sleep all day... and all night probably. I'm feel depressed about the whole not having a job and not sure what to do about it/still waiting for HP to quit being douches (which apparently will be in November) and I've been stressing about if I should go back to Kohls or not. It's not fun. And it's bringing me down. I also feel lonely, as my parents are gone, my older brother is in Chicago, my little brother is passed out on the couch and the boyfriend is working late tonight. I'm so lame, I don't have the TV on or music playing as I sit in my computer chair and list around on the internet.

So anyways...

Over the weekend I finished a hat/scarf set for the 14 year old daughter of my friend Amber. I love the colors she chose, though my hands have suffered from using so much Red Heart Super Saver (I didn't buy it, so I can't complain). But still, I'm proud of the way the project turned out, if not the pictures. Couldn't get the lighting right and I was using my phone.


Yes, as you can see, it's not the best picture, but you get the gist. I actually really enjoy crocheting flowers, so I was glad that the flowers on the scarf turned out okay, except for the one that only has 5 petals instead of 6. But Oh well.

Hopefully she enjoys it, since winter should be upon us soon.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Its-a Me! Mario!

I started this project in September of last year, and finally finished a few weeks ago. I've been too lazy/busy to post anything on here, but here I am at last, being a little more productive than usual (and avoiding working out for the moment).

This blanket is made up of 234 little 4" granny squares, that I sewed together with a yarn needle using various left over colors to minimize the amount of random colors seen in the seems. Ha ha. Seen in the seems. Anyways, I'm pretty proud of this blanket, and hope that one day, when I have my own place, it will sit in a place on honor on the back of my couch, that is, unless I actually complete my attempt at making a Detroit Lions afghan, which will then hold a place of honor.

It's big enough to fit completely over my double bed.


On a semi-unrelated note, my mom and I have been making Scarves for the Special Olympics, and I have managed to complete one so far. This one, I used a size N hook and doubled up on the yarn. Hopefully I can actually make more than one, but we'll see.